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Being a stay-at-home Mum - the PROS & CONS

Nicky Craig Bellaroo NZ - Sunday, July 19, 2015

 

Being a stay-at-home Mum has it's advantages and disadvantages, I think the "pros" are fairly obvious but sometimes the cons are not so obvious - obvious to those of us that are actually SAHM Mums, but perhaps not so obvious to those around us (in order to not have to keep repeating myself we will use SAHM instead).

Being a SAHM can sometimes be a major adjustment for those of us that were working full time up until giving birth to our precious little bundles. It's only now the weight of what my "job title" involves has hit home. I am a Mum - first and foremost, a cleaner, a caretaker, a cook, a bill-payer and sorter, a personal shopper, a taxi-driver, a laundromat and a blogger - the list is endless! None of these tasks are paid, my time is all "free" not to mention the fact that I have no annual leave, sick leave or scheduled lunchtime breaks. If I do get some "annual leave", so to speak, I have to make sure every single moment when I am not there is organised from nap times down to the last scheduled bottle feed. I can't even begin to think what it would be like to try and juggle all those tasks and throw in a full time job -these women are super Mum's for sure!

Don't get me wrong. I love being a SAHM so much! I am lucky enough, at this stage, to continue to be one for the near future. For me, the benefits of being allowed to be a SAHM far out way the "cons" of not being one.

Sometimes, though, being a SAHM is tough and I miss the ability to just scoot off to work and be someone OTHER than Mum. So, if you like me are a SAHM Mum and can relate or maybe you are considering being a full time Mum rather than going back to work or, perhaps you are working full time and considering being a SAHM then I hope this post may be of interest to you.

PROS
1. Witnessing milestones, this is fairly obvious, but being SAHM means you are certain to not miss out on those exciting milestones a child goes through as they learn and develop.
2. Being able to enjoy their company without times restraints and trying to cram mummy time into a few hours after work.
3. Just being there. For everything, seeing them grow, playing with them, singing to them and generally having fun.
4. The ability to be involved with their schooling, going on school trips and watching school plays and shows.
5. Having time to go out and socialise with other Mums and babies.
6. Not having to look "respectable" for work. I.e the ability to wear pyjamas all day and not wear make-up with out anyone commenting on my, generally, dishevelled appearance.
7. Not having to work for a, potential, tyrannical employer. Although, the baby or toddler is pretty much the tyrannical employer sometimes.
8. Not having to work in a job that you don't enjoy or really don't want to be doing.
9. No office politics other than toddler tantrums and epic meltdowns.

CONS
1. Never being able to leave without organising a military operation, that said though I'm sure it's even harder when your a working Mum.
2. No breaks from the children. There is no start or finish time, with no scheduled breaks in between and definitely no sick leave.
3. Being expected to have the house clean, the dinner cooked and the child entertained and looked after for when the "other half" gets home just because you're at home all day.
4. There are no promotions or bonuses. There is no well done you've done an amazing job, here have $100.
5. Being the "default" parent. You are the go to when it comes to decision making, clothes buying, food making - in other words, everything child related, or often house related, is your responsibility.
6. Your job title is Mum. You give so much of yourself that your not even sure who you were beforehand. Getting to go work claws back just a little bit of the life you had before children.
7. You are brainwashed with the constant sounds of Dora the explorer, nursery rhymes and fairytales and you crave adult company and conversation.
8. Having to do all the boring day-time things such as grocery shopping, taking the car for a warrant of fitness and housework.
9. If your baby is having a particularly grizzly day, there is no escape, you are stuck dealing with constant grizzling and tantrum throwing until HOPEFULLY your significant other can take over and relieve you.
10. Nap times are a constant battle of do you A. sit down, have something to eat and relax or B. clean the house, do some washing and prepare dinner in advance or C. none of the above.

Let's be honest, being a Mum is hard work regardless of whether you are a stay at home Mum or a working Mum. It's a thankless tasks that very rarely gets acknowledged or praised. We plug away at the millions of things we have to do on a daily basis because we have to, because it's the life we've chosen to live, because we love our children no matter what we suffer through and because we'd do anything to make sure they are cared for, nurtured and loved.

So, I put it to you... if money was no object and you had a choice would you be a SAHM? or would you choose to work!



Disclaimer

Ahh...I feel like I need to constantly add disclaimers to my blog posts. I have been fortunate enough to not have had any negative feedback on my blog posts so far but I know if I don't cover my arse then it'll probably happen the one time I don't - let's be honest though, it's going to happen anyway! I am not trying to gloat about being fortunate enough to be a SAHM nor am I dismissing the plight of a working Mum. I am just trying to shed light on the, sometimes, unsung heroes that are SAHM's!


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